How to Forgive Someone And Move On

Howdee:) You are not alone. Although, since you are reading this article, you are definitely on your way to finding peace again and finally getting a release from the feelings of anger, betrayal, constant nagging and memories of the wrongful act against you. We're not meant to be unhappy and learning how to Forgive and move on is a key lesson that we need to learn in this life so that we can be the beautiful, free, full of light souls, that we are destined to be. It's probably one of the most difficult lessons to learn but a very powerful one. We can have the ultimate Joy and Peace beyond understanding when we adjust the way we view the wrongs that have been done to us and instead, use those wrongs to make us stronger, more enlightened, more loving, more joyful in knowing that ultimately, all things, even the "wrong and hurtful things" will work together for our good. When one door slams shut in our face and we think all is over and lost, if we can trust, love, and continue to do good, a beautiful window that has an even better view will eventually open.

Understanding the Essence of Forgiveness

How to Forgive someone

Forgiveness is often misunderstood. It doesn’t mean forgetting what happened or excusing someone’s behavior; it is a decision to let go for our own well-being. Holding onto resentment can weigh us down, affecting our emotions and daily lives.

In my experience, I learned that forgiveness is not about the other person; it’s a choice to reclaim my own happiness. It calls for deep reflection, empathy towards those who hurt us, and a conscious effort to free ourselves from past grievances. It also teaches us to set boundaries and to love, respect, and honor ourselves. Research shows that practicing forgiveness can reduce stress and lead to a 40% boost in emotional well-being, highlighting its powerful impact on our lives.

On the contrary, holding on to resentment, hurt, and anger can be incredibly detrimental to one's mental and emotional well-being and health. These negative emotions can fester and grow, leading to increased stress, anxiety, and even depression. When we cling to feelings of resentment, we are essentially allowing the past to have power over our present and future. Holding onto hurt and anger towards someone is like drinking poison ourselves but hoping the other person suffers. We're actually only hurting ourselves. This can hinder our ability to move forward and make peace with the situation or person that caused us pain. Practicing forgiveness and letting go of anger can lead to a sense of liberation and inner peace. It allows us to focus on the present moment and create a more positive outlook on life. By choosing to release resentment and embrace forgiveness, we are ultimately choosing to prioritize our own well-being and mental health.

But First.....

It's important to acknowledge and process these emotions in a healthy way, whether through therapy, journaling, or talking to a trusted friend or family member. By confronting our feelings head-on, we can work towards forgiveness and healing. Letting go of resentment doesn't mean forgetting what happened or excusing the behavior that hurt us, but rather releasing the negative hold it has on us.

So How do we do it? How do we forgive Someone?

Forgiveness is a continuous journey but definitely one worth taking. Here are some powerful & practical steps that have helped me personally to move toward forgiveness:

1. Acknowledge Your Feelings

Recognizing and validating your emotions is essential for your overall well-being. After all, you were done wrong....let's not undermine that. When we suppress feelings such as anger or sadness, we are essentially bottling up those emotions, which can have detrimental effects on our mental and physical health.

One effective way to deal with these emotions is through journaling. By putting your thoughts and feelings on paper, you are giving yourself the opportunity to process them in a healthy way. Journaling allows you to gain clarity on your emotions, understand the root causes of your feelings, and explore possible solutions.

Moreover, journaling can serve as a form of self-reflection and self-discovery. It enables you to track patterns in your emotions and behaviors, identify triggers that lead to certain feelings, and ultimately work towards emotional growth and healing. Embracing and expressing your emotions, rather than suppressing them, is a vital part of self-care and personal development. Through journaling, you can cultivate a deeper understanding of yourself and enhance your emotional intelligence, leading to a more fulfilling and balanced life. Plus, it's nice to be able to say or write all your feelings down without judgment or consequences:) You can always rip it up or hide it in a lock box😉

2. Pray for Guidance

Prayer can be the Ultimate source of support & Guidance when facing challenges in forgiveness. I often pray for both myself and those who have hurt me. Praying provides comfort and perspective. It helps to shift my heart towards compassion and understanding and also helps to know what to do moving forward. One of my most favorite books that has inspired and as aided in answering my prayers time and time again is the Book Called Jesus Calling. The entire book is based off of scripture but is written in a way that feels like Jesus is speaking directly to you. It's a must have in our world today♥

3. Communicate Your Boundaries

Communicating your needs doesn’t negate forgiveness; it's essential. In my experiences, having conversations where I expressed my ability to forgive but also stated unacceptable behaviors helped uphold my boundaries gracefully.

Forgiveness does not mean accepting ongoing disrespect or harmful behaviors. Setting boundaries is essential for self-protection. For instance, after forgiving a friend who had betrayed my trust, I realized the importance of establishing clear limits to avoid future harm. This was not against my forgiveness; it enhanced it. By communicating my feelings and setting expectations, I was able to protect myself while holding the other person accountable.

4. Evaluate the Impact

Consider how holding onto resentment affects your life. For example, I took note of how resentment negatively influenced my mental health, relationships, and spiritual well-being. Realizing the extent of this impact motivated me to pursue forgiveness more quickly.

5. Practice Redirecting Your Thoughts to Achieve Emotional Healing

Redirecting your thoughts is a crucial skill that requires practice but offers immense benefits across various aspects of your life. It serves as a powerful tool to regain control over your emotions and prevent past negative experiences from dictating your present and future.

Before embarking on this redirecting practice, it is essential to give yourself the necessary time to grieve and process the events that have affected you. Once you feel ready to seek peace, move forward, and reclaim your inner strength, redirecting your thoughts can be a trans-formative process.

When you catch yourself dwelling on painful memories, rehashing hurtful words, or reliving past traumas, it is vital to recognize these patterns and consciously shift your focus to more positive and constructive thoughts. Although it may be challenging initially to break free from the cycle of negative thinking, redirecting your thoughts is a proactive step towards breaking the chains of emotional turmoil.

I like to have a GO TO thought or song that I sing when I find myself spiraling. That way you don't even have to come up with something to redirect your mind. Our minds are like an empty stage that must always has some act performing. It's very difficult to just stop thinking about something, we have to replace or fill that stage with something else.

6. Embrace Time and Patience

Remember that forgiveness takes time. I learned to give myself grace while navigating feelings of hurt. Healing is not immediate, and it’s important to allow gradual progress.

Here is a great short video on forgiveness as well

The Joy of Moving On

Once I embraced forgiveness, I felt a thrilling sense of liberation. Moving on doesn't erase memories; it allows me to prevent those moments from controlling my happiness. I can fully engage in life, build new relationships, and enjoy moments without the weight of past hurts.

Letting go of anger has empowered me to seek joy in everyday experiences. I feel lighter, more present, and ready to face new opportunities fully.

Embracing the Journey Ahead

Forgiveness is a complex journey leading to peace and joy. By recognizing the importance of boundaries, leaning on faith, and practicing forgiveness, I have found ways to let go of hurt and embrace healing.

Forgiving someone is ultimately for you. It’s about understanding your worth and moving forward with grace. As we embrace forgiveness, may we keep Christ’s example close and allow it to shape our actions.

Forgiveness is not an endpoint; it is a pathway to becoming our best selves. Let us choose to forgive, uphold our boundaries, and live joyfully as we move forward and trust that all will well and work together for our good.

Love to you!

Theresa Mae

fearlessesti.com