5 Ways to Support Your Daughter Through Anxiety and Panic Attacks

First off, let me tell you that you are not alone. Having a child that struggles with anxiety and panic attacks is very hard and unfortunately is becoming more and more common. My daughter that struggles with this is now 17 years old. Since she was little, she has been battling anxiety and panic attacks. My daughter also has epilepsy which is triggered by stress and anxiety. The whole situation creates a vicious cycle of pain, fear, not being able to function, seizures, sickness, and stress. It's awful to watch and creates a ton of anxiety for myself as well. We definitely do not have it all figured out but we have really learned a lot through out these 17 years and I'm hoping this post will give some help and comfort to other moms trying to help their daughters.

I Wish I could go Back

When my daughter was little, I remember getting so frustrated because anytime we would try to go somewhere, she would start to feel sick. Getting her up for school every morning was a battle between me and my daughter and then me and my husband because he was upset that I could never get her to school on time. We'd be out trying to do something fun but she could never enjoy it because she didn't feel well. She started having seizures around 2 years old and we had everything tested and checked out but everything came back normal which was good but also difficult because we didn't know why she was always not feeling well. I didn't understand. I wish I could go back so I could have been more empathetic to my daughter. Instead of helping her, I'm sure I made things worse because I would get so frustrated. Well, God has a way to teach us and I am so grateful that he taught me.

When I got my own Taste of what my daughter was feeling

I truly believe that if this experience that I'm about to tell you about, had not happened, my daughter would not be here today. Makes me emotional just writing about it. When my daughter was around 10 years old, I decided that I was going to learn how to do lash extensions and start working. The previous 10 years since my daughter had been born, I was a full time stay at home mom. Starting work again and putting myself out there and doing something so tedious like lash extensions was very nerve wracking for me. Also, my marriage was a bit rocky and everything felt very unsettled and uncomfortable. I started having these episodes while lashing where I felt like I was going to pass out and the thought of having to tell my client that I couldn't finish their lashes made it so much worse. Well this kept happening and it started to creep into my life outside of work. I really took a turn for the worse one day when I was driving home from taking my daughter to see her neurologist. I had all my kids in the back of my car and I was trying to get back home because I had a lash client coming. The anxiety started to really kick in and turned into a full blown panic attack. Luckily I was able to pull the car over but as I soon as I did, I ended up passing out and having a seizure myself. Peed my pants, bit my tongue, and everything. It was by far the worst experience I had ever had in my life. I had never felt so sick in my life. I couldn't even hardly speak or move after coming out of it. Now that this had happened, for almost 2 years afterwards, anytime I would get into the car to drive, a panic attack was triggered. I ended up quieting my job because I couldn't finish a lash set without feeling sick and like I was going to pass out. It got so bad that just leaving my bedroom was difficult. I even got to the point where I was contemplating suicide because of how awful I constantly felt and the feeling that I would never be able to function like normal again. I had no idea that this was exactly what my daughter had been battling all along. I had no Clue. And unless you have been there, in that black hole, there is no way to completely understand how debilitating anxiety and panic attacks can be. If I had not experienced this for myself, and learned how to overcome it so that I could help and empathize with my daughter, I truly believe my daughter would have eventually ended her own life. Makes me sick to even think about it. So how do we help our daughters? This is what I have learned.

1. Listen and Validate Her Feelings

Listening plays a crucial role in supporting your daughter through anxiety and panic attacks. Create a safe space where she can express her emotions without fear of judgment. Validate her feelings by acknowledging her struggles and reassuring her that it's okay to feel overwhelmed. By showing empathy and understanding, you can help alleviate some of her anxiety.

2. Encourage Healthy Coping Mechanisms

Encourage your daughter to engage in healthy coping mechanisms that can help manage her anxiety. Some of our favorites, are the app called Rooted. My daughter and I still use this app often to this day. It's free and it walks you through your panic attack. It also goes in depth with information to explain what you are experiencing and helps you to understand and not be afraid. Also, as you read and follow the prompts, it definitely begins to help calm you and helps get you through whatever situation you are in that is triggering the attack.

Another favorite of ours is this YouTube video. We've watched it so many times😉. It always helps.

Another help is the book Bad Ass Ways to end Anxiety and Panic Attacks.

One thing I have learned as well along the way is to be patient with myself as well as my daughter. You'll start to think you've overcome it or that your daughter has overcome it and it's all better! But disappointment hits when it comes back again. It definitely gets easier because you know what it is, and you've learned the tools but it's still hard and sometimes the tools don't work as quickly as you want. Be patient with your daughter and love her and allow her to have hard days. Don't get discouraged.

3. Educate Yourself and Her About Anxiety

Knowledge is power when it comes to supporting your daughter through anxiety and panic attacks. Take the time to educate yourself about anxiety disorders, their symptoms, and treatment options. Again the Rooted app has great free info! Share this information with your daughter to help her understand what she is experiencing. By being informed, both you and your daughter can work together to cope with anxiety more effectively.

4. Seek Professional Help When Necessary

While your love and support are invaluable, professional help may be needed to address your daughter's anxiety and panic attacks effectively. Seek guidance from mental health professionals such as therapists or counselors who specialize in treating anxiety disorders. They can provide your daughter with the necessary tools and strategies to manage her anxiety and improve her overall well-being. Know that some counselors are better than others so don't be afraid to try different counselors and therapists. We had some counselors that were completely useless and had zero understanding of what we were actually dealing with even though they thought they did. On the contrary, we had some excellent counselors who were extremely helpful. Also, don't be afraid of medication. I was always anti medication and wanted to try everything before resorting to medication. And I did try everything and it helped but both my daughter and I did not feel completely ourselves again and able to fully function until we finally got some help with medication. Now I am the complete opposite. I feel extremely grateful for medication and that we have it to help us. Medication can save lives.

5. Create a Supportive Environment at Home

Creating a supportive environment at home can significantly impact your daughter's mental health. Foster open communication, encourage positive reinforcement, and establish healthy routines that promote emotional well-being. By cultivating a safe and nurturing home environment, you can help your daughter feel secure and supported as she navigates anxiety and panic attacks.

Remember, supporting your daughter through anxiety and panic attacks is a journey that requires patience, understanding, and unconditional love. By implementing these five strategies, you can empower your daughter to overcome her challenges and thrive despite the obstacles she may face.

Helping your daughter with anxiety is a process that involves continuous learning and adaptation. Stay by her side, be her pillar of strength, and believe in her ability to conquer her fears. Together, you can navigate through the storm of anxiety and emerge stronger together on the other side.

Supporting your daughter through anxiety is not always easy, but your unwavering love and support can make all the difference in her healing journey.

Remember: You are not alone. Your love and support can make a world of difference in your daughter's life. Lastly, one of the most powerful tools that you have to help guide you is Prayer. God is Real!! He will help you and will never leave your side, and He infinitely loves you and your daughter. This I KNOW is true🙏

Need a little help hearing Jesus? Check out one of My favorite books♥

Love to you and our daughters♥

Theresa Mae

Fearless Esti